This has been asked before it seems but I am not sure there is an answer.
If I edit an Obsidian file using an external editor (vim, sublime, etc), and the file is open in Obsidian, it won’t display the changes until I close and reopen the file.
I have a macro/shortcut that writes a task to an “Inbox” note. The danger is if I change a note that’s been updated by the macro before opening/closing it, I overwrite the changes from the macro.
I’m not quite sure what you’re asking for us to help you with.
But you’re quite right that to open a file for editing in two editors at the same time is dangerous, and asking for trouble. I do believe that the best cause of action is to stop doing that, and be sure to close the file in either editor before editing/changing it through macros or similar in the other editor.
There is also a command in the menus called “Force reload”, but I’m not sure if that would just reload Obsidian itself, or also all files within the editor. It could be worth a try, if you’re adamant about not closing down files before possibly changing them in another editor.